Thursday, December 20, 2012

Come On!

Song of the day:  Justin Bieber ft. Boyz II Men - Fa La La

Today we had a snow day!  It's nice to finally have snow, but as it's our first year as home owners, snow removal kind of blows :/  I was out shoveling before 6:00 am this morning, and went out again at 11:00.  Kyle's out shoveling right now.  My right shoulder and left forearm are killing me!  I actually thought about not writing a blog because it hurts so much :(  yayyy winter!

This semester of school is FINALLY over!  The last two weeks have been super stressful.  I've had six papers and six finals that had taken over my life, and a sick kid that I needed to stay home with.  Not the easiest.  I was hoping to end the semester on a stronger note, but I ended up turning in kind of average papers, and I'm hoping my exams went well...  I'm slightly crazy and check D2L and WINS ever few hours to look for any grade updates - none to report so far!  Kyle was making fun of me because I genuinely like my teachers for the whole semester and then I complain about them until grades are in.  I understand they have A TON of stuff to grade, but come on!  

In the past four months, if I have told you I would do something for you, and it was "no big deal" and I STILL haven't done it, NOW IS THE TIME TO REMIND ME!  I have a little break before my winter class starts, and I need reminding because my mind could only take so much information this semester.  Unfortunately if I didn't write it down (or sometimes, even if I did) I don't remember, and it didn't get done.  

Besides feeling like I'm old and falling apart, this snow day has been pretty good.  I made some amazing food in the crock pot and the sauce/marinade I whipped up to put on the meat and veggies while they cooked was AMAZING.  I mean, I don't want to sound conceded, but I am a really good cook when I have the time!  I miss eating "real" food, lol.  Before the snow day, I was planning on taking the kids to daycare, then going to a coffee shop and reading for a while, going Christmas shopping (since that hasn't really been started yet), then maybe getting my nails done and watching some Grey's Anatomy.... but that didn't happen.  So tomorrow I have to try to get everything done, pack, and I have an eye exam in the morning.  Ugh, I just kind of wanted a lazy day where I could wander stores without direction.  

We have so much coming up in the next week.  This weekend is Christmas with Kyle's dad and step-mom, Monday-Wednesday is Christmas with my family, then next weekend is Christmas with Kyle's mom.  We're thinking about going to the Dells for New Years Eve, but doing nothing sounds kind of nice too.  Then on January 2nd, I'm back in school!  Probably not going to be the most relaxing vacation, but when are holiday vacations ever relaxing?  Don't get me wrong, it will be fun, but fun and relaxing don't always go hand in hand!  

Now that I've had a chance to come up from the semester, I realize that it's December 20th and we haven't even started thinking about Christmas Cards.... so, just imagine my children smiling, wearing red or green, and the word's Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy New Year, etc printed underneath them.  And now time to search the internet for gift ideas!  

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

The time will pass anyway

Song of the Day: Neon Trees - Sins of My Youth

Apparently it's been a while since I last wrote!  School has pretty much taken over my life, as it should, so I haven't had much to write about.

On weight loss: Thankfully I haven't gained any weight in the last month, but I also haven't really lost any either.  I haven't been eating the greatest, and the only work out I get is Ballet twice a week for 75 minutes.  I can tell my core and body in general have gotten stronger, but not really lost weight.  I am fitting back into a pair of jeans that were tight before I got pregnant, so that's exciting!  I still have 12 lbs of pregnancy weight left though, so that doesn't really make sense, but I'll take it!

This week I've really been trying to get back into eating healthy, and it's only day 2, but I'm doing well so far.  What kills me is when I get home and I have guacamole and chips for dinner.  Not the worst thing I could eat, but not the best either.  The thing is, I even have all of these pre-packaged, single serving, good for you foods, but I keep forgetting about them.  I started leaving them out on the counter (the non-frozen ones) so I actually remember to eat!

I also tend to eat worse when Kyle is home.  We tend to order out a lot more, and we both acknowledge that this is a problem.  So, that's the first step right??

On school:  School's going really well!  I'm really liking all of my classes, and my field training sight is awesome!  There's been some tough stuff to deal with emotionally, but I feel like I've handled it really well, and I couldn't be more sure that this is what I want to do.

It's hard to believe that I only have a month left of classes!  I have so many research papers left to write!  I'm pretty much in a research hole until mid-December.  I'm registering for my classes at 6:00 today and I'm pretty freaked out.  Two of my classes are closed, but one professor said that he opens up more spots as registration continues, so just check back.  Another professor said she'd add me if it came down to the semester starting and there still wasn't a spot open, but to keep checking for someone to drop it before then.  Whew. 

I had a meeting about grad school last Friday and found out that it's three years instead of the two that I was anticipating.  Also, I graduate in Dec '13, but the program only has summer or fall starts.  And there's two classes I need to take in undergrad that I wasn't aware of.  Bummer.  I was super upset about it for a while.  Realizing that Elliot will be going into 2nd grade and Caroline will be starting Kindergarten when I'm finally done with school really puts everything into a time perspective.  I've been starting to feel better about the time, then this morning I read a friend's facebook status that said,

            "Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. 
                                                          The time will pass anyway."

Beautiful, and so so true.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

quack quack

I don't really have much to write.  The kids finally seem to be healthy, and I'm hoping and praying it stays that way!  We've been on a continuous cycle of sickness for the last three weeks, resulting in 4 days of missed classes and me being extremely stressed out!  But everything has been back to normal this week, and I'm hoping it stays that way for the rest of the school year!

Fun news: Caroline finally has two teeth on the bottom!  Elliot got his first teeth at 4 months old and had a full mouth by 10 months.  Caroline got her first two at 7 months :)  I was worried that she would end up getting all of them at once, but thankfully it looks like we're going to avoid that!

With the kids being sick, and me missing school, I feel like I'm constantly behind, or trying to catch up.  I sometimes feel like a duck, cool and calm on the surface, but underneath my legs are kicking a mile a minute and I'm just trying not to drown.  I could really use some more library time.  Thankfully I'm back into the rhythm of having field training Friday mornings and I can go to the library Friday afternoons.  And that being said, I have homework to do :)

OH - This weekend Kyle, the kids, and I are participating in the American Heart Association - Heart Walk 2012 in Madison!  We're still working on raising donations, so please head to our website to donate

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

The Good and the Bad of it.

Song of the Day: Fuel - Bad Day

Bad things that happened today: 
1.  Elliot woke up at 4:30. At 5:15 he threw a tantrum because I wouldn't let him play with my phone in the bathroom. At 5:30 he threw another tantrum because I wouldn't let him take his toothbrush downstairs, because we brush our teeth in the bathroom (sometimes logic doesn't work on 2 year olds).
2.  Elliot's second tantrum woke Caroline up a little bit, Elliot heard her, then went and climbed into her crib, completely waking her up.
3.  I forgot Elliot's water cup for the car ride.  Not horrible since I had my water bottle with a straw in my back pack.
4.  Get to the library, realize I forgot my speakers for my presentation today.
5.  Go to Walmart, but cheap speakers, try them out in my car, and realize they're crappy, that's why they're so cheap.
6.  Back at the library ready to print out my handouts for my presentation, and my jump drive is completely failing to connect to the computer. FREAK OUT STARTS HERE. Thankfully I had emailed a copy to my professor, so I still had one.
7.  Get a call from daycare, Caroline has gunk coming from the corner of her eye (again), and she needs to get picked up.
8.  Go to my professor to see if I can reschedule tomorrow's exam for Monday and start crying because I'm so extremely stressed out (also because I missed last week and am still trying to play catch up), and she's so extremely nice, and also a mom so she completely understands.
9.  I thought I was buying a purple gatorade, but when it came out it was blue.

Good things that happened today:

1.  Despite all the stressful complications, my presentation actually went pretty well!
2.  After talking to the daycare director, we both agreed that if her eyes aren't pink, she doesn't have pink eye, and she's fine to go to daycare even with drainage.  THANK GOD!!
3.  Kyle was on his way home from Milwaukee so he stopped in Whitewater and took the kids home so I can go back to the library and study.
4.  The blue gatorade is actually more of an indigo color, and actually 'fierce grape.'  And it's pretty tasty.

Sometimes there's more bad/stressful events than good ones, but at the end of the day you just have to take a deep breath, and keep moving forward.

And I'm so thankful for my wonderful husband :)  ....and now time to study!

Monday, September 24, 2012

a break from your regularly scheduled programming

Song of the Day:  PSY - Gangnam Style    .... I love this song.

I'm not blogging as much as I would like, but all with good reason.  I'm really enjoying my semester and my field training placement!  I have really been enjoying all of my classes and professors.  The only reason I have time to blog today is because I'm home with a sick kid.  

Elliot and Caroline have both been fighting colds for the last three weeks.  Thankfully Caroline is down to a slightly runny nose, but Elliot isn't fairing so well.  BE PREPARED FOR GRAPHIC DETAILS! Yesterday he started having a yellow drainage from his left eye.  It looked like snot coming from his eye.  I was worried because I think I heard that pink eye is going around the older kids at his daycare.  I called Dean on Call Nurse Hotline and she asked if his eye was pink.  I said I don't think it's pink, but I think that I'm trying to see pink in his eye because I want him to be able to be treated for something.  She said if it's not pink, then it's not pink eye, just a product of his cold virus and it may spread to the other eye as well.  She went on to say to wipe it with a cold wet cotton ball and wash his hands a lot.  ... So do what I was already doing.  Really, hearing "you're child has a virus there's nothing we can do" really gets old.  Before bed Elliot had a slight fever and was definitely not feeling well.  Elliot came in about 1:00am coughing and wanting to cuddle.  After cuddling for a while we put him back in his bed because he just flails all over ours and then nobody gets any sleep.  When he woke up this morning he looked like crap :(  His eyes were swollen, but thankfully not too gunky.  

I realized that we hadn't given him his (over the counter) allergy medicine all weekend because the pollen counts were all down so we didn't think he needed it.  I gave it to him this morning and most of the swelling went down.  He doesn't have a fever anymore either, so I think with continued allergy meds he should be good to go tomorrow. 

I hate missing school.  Getting notes only helps so much.  I wish there was a camera running for each class so I could just watch it later.  I also worry that people think that I'm using my children as an excuse to just not go to class, because a lot of parents do that.  I'm not saying all parents do it, or even most, but it does happen .  When your kid has a fever or is too sick for daycare, yes you have to stay home, and yes, you are a parent first, but when you're kid has a little cold and you want to stay home with them to cuddle all week, that's no reason to miss class - or if it is, don't complain that you have no idea what's going on because you didn't bother getting notes or asking anyone.  Okay, done with that mini rant!

I'm hoping to get some school work done today, but that's probably not going to happen unless Elliot and Caroline nap at the same time.  Every time I bring anything out, Elliot goes into "Helping Mode."  It's really cute, and would be nice if I needed help identifying each letter in my book :) 

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

back to school, back to school...

After today I've had the 'first day' of all of my classes!  I'm really excited for this semester because I'm really interested in all of my classes.  I got my first choice in Field Training and I'm going to be shadowing a school counselor at a local elementary school!  I already met with her and I think it's going to be a really good fit for the semester!  

The kids did really well on their first (and second) day of day care!  Elliot could care less that I was leaving!  Which is SUCH an improvement on last year's first day drop off (more like first two weeks of drop off).  Caroline is a little too young for the separation anxiety yet, and I'm hoping that she's fully adjusted by the time she is in that phase.  Elliot has loved being able to play outside and with all of the new toys and friends inside.  Today they learned about the color red and he's been telling me all about 'red' even though I'm not 100% sure about what he's telling me about red, lol.  Caroline had a rough first day, but after they figured out to put her in the bouncy that is identical to the one we have at home, she's been great.  She loves bouncing and gets so excited!  She's eating well and has started on cereal, fruits, and veggies, but her naps aren't there yet.  It's hard because she falls asleep on the way to daycare so her naps are off.  She's also pretty much refusing to fall asleep.  There's still a lot of new stuff to get used to, so I'm not worried about it yet.  Well, I'm trying not to be worried about it yet.  It took Elliot about two weeks until he started napping really well at day care, so I need to give Caroline that time as well before I start freaking out :)  

The only downside about school is my 5:15 wake up call.  Tuesday, Kyle had a super early flight, so I woke up at 3:00 when his alarm went off and couldn't get back to bed, so I was ready really early.  Today I woke up at 5:15 when my alarm went off, and we were late getting out of the house.  So it looks like 5:00 is going to be the magic number.  Oof-da.  I've been so exhausted and am beyond ready for bed by the time Elliot goes to bed.  I just don't have enough hours in the day to catch up from Tuesday morning.  I can't wait for this weekend!  Hello nap time :)

As far as eating goes, we haven't ordered out yet!  But trust me, I wanted to!  I didn't get to prepare for the week like I wanted to, but we have still had good meals.  It's going to take a few weeks to really get into the swing of things, but I'm pretty optimistic!

Friday, August 31, 2012

A Week In Review

Song of the Day:  Taylor Swift - We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together  ...Thanks Ms. Swift for writing yet ANOTHER song that I will 'never ever ever' get out of my head :)

 My weigh-in this week shows just how ridiculous weight can actually be.  I've apparently lost 4 lbs this week.  Don't get me wrong, I am glad to see the loss, but I haven't really done anything this week to contribute to it.  I mean, I have been eating MUCH better and mainly in smaller portions than I normally would, but I haven't worked out since Friday.  But it is towards the end of TOM and that's really where the weight loss comes from; no more bloating.  It really is ridiculous what women have to go through!  

Last night for dinner I made a chicken fettuccine alfredo bake with leeks.  It was so good - and easy because it wasn't from scratch ;)  I lightly salted and put garlic powder (tons) on the chicken (1 lb) and baked them first (350, 30 minutes).  Then I shredded it and put it in a 9x13 pan.  Then I cooked penne rigate noodles for 2 minutes less than the box recommended.  I added a jar of alfredo sauce, 1/2 cup of milk and 3/4 of a bag of shredded mozzarella (I think a 16 oz bag).  Then I added 1 leek, halved then sliced.  I mixed it all up in the pan so I didn't have to deal with an extra bowl.  Then I topped with the rest of the cheese and covered with aluminum foil.  I had time earlier in the day so that's when I did my prep, and just put the pan in the refrigerator.  When it was close to time for dinner I cooked the food at 350 for 20 minutes - with the aluminum foil still on.  Then I took the foil off and continued cooking for 20 minutes (or until cheese is bubbly).  It was so good!  Leeks have a taste between onion and garlic, so they were a perfect addition.  Here's a pic of the finished product... with a few servings missing :)

Unfortunately, Kyle can't eat it, but I'll make it again when he's gone :)

This week we also had salmon and make at home pizza.  The salmon was pretty straight forward, just lightly salt and pepper and some lemon peel.  The pizza was store bought crust, store bought sauce, mozzarella cheese (also store bought, lol), and sliced pepperoni from the deli (AMAZING).  It's not from scratch, but it's still better for you than Pizza Hut!  I don't always have time to make my own sauces, and the kind people at Classico (brand) understand that.  When I buy jarred products I tend to look for the least amount of salt and sugar, but I also go by taste (I hate Ragu). 

This week's Pinterest project:

+ Carpet Powder from Pinterest: The recipe doesn't actually say how much baking soda to use, so I just used about 1/3 of the box (what I had left, but set aside 1 tsp to make chocolate chip cookies in the afternoon :) ).  I didn't have orange oil, but I did have melaleuca oil which is a natural cleaner, and smells really good!  I put a ton of drops in the baking soda until it seemed right, probably 15-20 ish.  I didn't have a parmesan cheese container, so I tried pocking holes in a mason jar with a nail.  The holes ended up too small and not enough powder came out.  I gave up on that idea and just spooned out the powder.  Our rug wasn't smelly with anything in particular, but it just needed a lift.  The powder definitely worked, and now our house smells really good!  I also like that it's ingredients that are safe and I don't have to worry about putting Caroline on the rug.  I'll definitely use this again!

Today is my last day as a stay-at-home mom.  School starts Tuesday!  I'm really bittersweet about the whole thing.  I'm sad that the kids are going to daycare, especially Caroline.  There's so much that I may miss now.  What if she takes her first step there?  I'm also concerned that Elliot and Caroline won't get to see each other and that their relationship may suffer, but I'm going to talk to daycare and see if they can possibly see each other a few times a day.  I'm not at all concerned about Elliot!  He had a play date with my cousins kids yesterday and he had so much fun!  He was so excited that after they left he almost fell asleep while eating lunch.  And it was macaroni, which is his FAVORITE.  He's really going to enjoy playing with the other kids, and I even saw some kids from his old class still there, not that he'll remember them, but still fun :)

Well, time to get ready for the 3 day weekend!  Happy Labor Day everyone!

Friday, August 24, 2012

A Week In Review

Song of the day:  Santigold - The Keepers

I've been trying to make an effort to:
     1. Make home cooked meals for dinner, and 
     2.  Actually make/do some of the stuff that I repin on Pinterest.

So far, so good.  Some things this week were more fun than others, but I tried something new, and that's the whole point, right?

FYI: Many of the links will send you to the 'pin' on my pinterest page, not the original page they are from.  Follow the digital trail to get the recipes, and repin!

     + Ranch dressing from Pinterest: The flavor is amazing!  And the decrease in calories is even better!  The problem is it's really thin and runny.  If you like a thicker ranch (like I do) I would recommend slowly adding the milk until it's the consistency you want.  I even put it in a mason jar that I had so it even looks like the pinterest picture!  Win!
     + Chicken nuggets and chips with honey mustard from Cooking Light:  I found this recipe in the September 2012 issue of Cooking Light magazine.  It's easy enough, but very involved*.  The marinade of dill pickle juice and buttermilk made the chicken taste SO GOOD!  Apparently this is what Chick-fil-A does with their chicken.  Because of Kyle's lactose allergy, I used low fat plain kefir instead of buttermilk.  From what I can tell it turned out fine, and I'll be making this substitute for other recipes as well!  I think a combination of my microwave power, how thick/thin the potatoes were cut, and how much oil was on them all contributed to the sogginess of the chips.  I would recommend thinner than 1/8" and barely any oil.  I ended up abandoning the microwave and broiling them after the nuggets were cooked.  I then put the nuggets under the broiler to make sure they were hot and crispy right before serving.  The honey mustard sauce was really good, but I did add an extra tbsp of honey.  I know they're trying to be healthy so they use the minimal amount of sugar, but I thought it was a little heavy on the mustard.  Because the meal isn't something that is easily whipped together, I've dubbed this a "weekend meal," and trust me, we will definitely be making it again!  NOTE:  The honey mustard sauce does not keep well in the fridge overnight.  Make what you'll need for the meal, then make more the next day for any leftovers.
     * This is the meal where I set the plastic bag (that held the chicken/panko bread mixture) on a still warm burner.  Don't worry, the plastic came off as it cooled.
     + Catfish from Pinterest: About a week ago Kyle came home from the grocery store with catfish.  We put it in the freezer, and I wasn't really sure what to do with it.  Like many people, outside of batter fried fish, I'm not really sure what to do with it... and I don't even batter fry fish at home, I get that at Syl's (AMAZING).  So, like any good 21st century 20 something, I went on Pinterest and found a recipe.  SO SO GOOD!  We will definitely be eating this again!  Mine didn't turn out like the picture, but whatever, it still tasted amazing.  I also added 1/2 tsp of cayenne pepper to the fish.  When I think catfish, I think a little kick, and it was definitely a good add.  SIDE:  I served it with quinoa and steamed broccoli and cauliflower.

     + BBQ Pulled Pork from  What's not to love about a good pulled pork sandwich??  I used extra lean pork tenderloin because I really don't like trimming meat.  I used Sweet Baby Rays for the sauce base, and instead of 2 tbsp of mustard I used 1 tbsp yellow mustard and 1 tbsp dijon mustard.  I also added 1.5 (ish) tbsp worcestershire sauce.  Thankfully I read the comments before making the pork and I definitely agree that you should dump all of the broth after the pork cooks instead of just skimming the fat (keep the onions).  I was afraid that I needed some of the broth that I had already dumped, so I did add about 1/4-1/2 cup of water after adding the sauce to the pork.  AMAZING.  This is one of our favorite meals.  There's enough meat for leftovers and to freeze another meal!  SIDE: We served the pork on wheat hamburger buns from the bakery, and topped it with coleslaw from the deli.  For sides we had potato salad from the deli and steamed bell peppers and garlic*.
     *1 green pepper chopped, 1/2 red pepper chopped, 6 cloves of garlic halved.  Stir in 1 tsp of lemon juice, Salt to taste.  Steam in pan (add a little water so the veggies don't stick) over medium high heat.

     + Pistachio-Chai Muffins from Cooking Light: I've made these muffins before, but this time I used kefir instead of buttermilk (last time I just used milk) and I 86'd the pistachios.  So really they're just chai muffins.  I wanted to be able to give Elliot one without worrying that he'd chock on a pistachio.  I did forget to spray the liners before putting the batter in, so they stick to the sides a little, but not the end of the world (we all know the top is the best part anyway).  Elliot and I both had one this morning and they're so good!  Elliot thinks they're cupcakes, lol.  I did add the frosting (so yeah, kinda cupcakes) before the 5 min cooling period ended, so it ended up running all over the place, but having only a thin coating of sugar on the muffin is probably a good thing :)  I'm planning on making another batch and freezing them for quick breakfasts for the semester. 

Random Pinterest Ideas:
     + Morning Yoga:  I'm really trying to make an effort to at least do something every day.  I've been having really bad lower back pain, and figured one of the many "do this every day" yoga/exercise pins that I've re-pinned might actually work if I actually tried it!  I am definitely liking this routine!  I just do a plain downward dog in step 3, between steps 5 and 6 I added warrior II, and I also added a few child's pose here and there.  I did the routine three times alternating with some core/leg/arm workout/activities that I've taken from a few workout dvd's that I've done along the way.  Overall, my back isn't hurting as bad and I'm not as stiff in the morning, or throughout the day.  This is definitely something I'll keep doing.

     + Detox Bath:  I've been feeling really crappy this week because of a head cold that will not go away, so I really wanted this to work.  I did have a few ingredient hiccups, and I'm hoping that's why it didn't.  I didn't have plain epsom salt, I had Dr. Teal's Relaxing Epsom Salt (which is amazing, but not for a detox), but I figured since oils were also an option that maybe my salts would be a two for one kind of deal.  I also used the ground ginger option.  According to the website you should fill the tub with comfortably hot water.  I filled our tub, but as it was filling, the water got cooler, so I had comfortably warm water.  It also says that you should start sweating within the first few minutes.  I didn't sweat at all, which leads me to believe that it's the hot water that causes you to sweat, not the ingredients... or maybe the ingredients are activated by hot water, I don't know.  Either way, it didn't work.  I stayed in there for the full 40 minutes (while reading Twilight..... I know, I know... but I didn't care if the book got wet, or if I couldn't get to a good stopping point).  It didn't detox me, but I did smell good.

All in all, not a bad week of trying new things!  In regular news, on Tuesday I picked up my school books!  I also became "that person" who takes the free text books sitting outside the bookstore that the school is no longer using.  But the topics could be helpful, and they seem really interesting - one is meant for teaching students, "Teaching children to read and write" that will be a beneficial read!  My classes this semester are Introduction to Scientist-Practitioner (psychology), Research Methods (psychology), Principals of Behavior Modification, Field Training (psychology - I find out where I'm going on the first day back to school!!), and Ballet I.  I'm ready for school to start, but I'm nervous about how it's going to affect the kids.  One thing that I'm bummed about is they won't be able to spend the whole day together like they do now.  I don't know how that's going to affect their relationship, and it really has me considering in-home care (nanny).  But I wouldn't even know where to begin in finding a nanny, and worry about reliability.  

One thing that I'm trying to do to make this semester more productive cooking wise (last year we ate A LOT of Pizza Hut and other take out) is make meals that can be frozen.  I just ordered the cookbook "Don't Panic - Dinner's in the Freezer" after seeing it recommended on Pinterest.  I'm really excited to get it!  One thing that I do hate though, is that a lot of quick and budget friendly recipes have cheese in them.  And not like, "top with cheese if desired" but "and throw 3 cups of 3 different kinds of cheeses into the bowl."  Kyle is allergic to lactose (no, not intolerant, anaphylactic shock allergic) so I can't make anything with cheese, because there's not really a GOOD substitute.  I know there's substitutes, but please, I'm from Wisconsin.  

This week it looks like I gained almost 2 lbs.  I'm not really sure how that's even possible, so I'm chalking it up to water retention and overall feeling yucky.  I took my measurements, and even though I'm "down" only 3 ish lbs, I've lost a little over 5" total (2 coming from my waist!), so I don't care what the scale says, I'm definitely changing for the better!   

Friday, August 17, 2012

may the odds be ever in your favor.

Song of the Day:  Sammy Adams - Driving Me Crazy

I took a break from blogging because I was taking Psychology of Childhood as an online class for the last three weeks.  Any chance I had to sit at the computer was spent on school work.  And I'm happy to report that unless I get a D on my paper, I have an A in the class :)  The professor even complimented me on my responses and understanding of the material, and she's the chair of my department, so she's a good person to impress!  

Even though I haven't been posting I have been doing a weekly weigh-in.  The numbers are posted on the side of my page.  It was going pretty well, then this last week I was up 1.2 lbs.  I made a lot of bad food choices that weekend, so I'm really not surprised.  Unfortunately I haven't made the best food choices this week either.  

I am kind of on the Nutrisystem diet.  I ordered the food, and it's good, but Kyle's not traveling so it's not really practical.  And with school starting in two weeks, and my very small lunch break, I can't really make food.  It was obviously working based on my weight loss, and I wasn't even able to really work out besides taking the kids on some walks.  I can tell that I've definitely lost inches though.  Instead of ordering the food again I found their cookbook on Amazon for $5 and will pair those dinners with Cooking Light dinners.  On Wednesday I made the family favorite Chicken and Lemon Leek Linguine.  *sigh* It is so amazing!!  

I'm taking a ballet class this semester, and I'm a little nervous about it.  I'm not nervous about the actual class, more about how I look and comparing myself to the other students.  I'm taking this class because I will have 119 credits after fulfilling my requirements, I really do enjoy dancing, and I'm hoping ballet will help improve my core, which is non existent after two kids in less than two years.

I also just sent a professor my preferences for my field training posting!  Hopefully I'll hear back from her soon because I'm really excited to find out where I'll be spending the semester!  Two week break, then back to school!

And, the Hunger Games comes out tomorrow!  I haven't seen the movie yet because we really don't get out to see movies, so I think I might reread the book this afternoon!!

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Redefining "Full"

Song of the Day: Katy Perry - Wide Awake

This morning after eating my well proportioned breakfast of a health food "pastry" and cup of non-fat yogurt, I thought to myself, "Well, that was good but I'm not full."  Then I realized that I wasn't hungry either. 

Over the years I have changed the word "full" from meaning satisfied to stuffed, or overstuffed.  I had decided that if I wasn't feeling heavy and slightly sluggish by the time I was done eating, then I didn't eat enough, and therefore I wasn't "full."  I semi-recently read an article about how French parents teach their children about food.  One thing that really stuck out to me was that instead of asking their children if they "are full" they ask if they "are still hungry."  It's amazing how one little word can change the entire meaning of a concept.  Even though I was a little in awe of this revelation, it obviously didn't change my thinking because I still ate until I was past full for the next few months.  But this morning, as I was reflecting on my own level of fullness/not-hungry-ness, I remembered those words.

So yes, I may not be "full" but I'm not hungry either.  And that's a good thing.

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

...and again...

Song of the Day:  Ellie Goulding - Lights

Okay, I feel like I've become a broken record lately, BUT I'm going to get back on track.  I started today.  I counted all of my calories (came in at about 1337), had 4 servings of veggies, 2 servings of fruit, and drank 12 glasses of water.  I use a nalgene which holds 4 glasses of water, and I drink water all day anyway, so 12 is pretty average for me.  Along with eating healthy I did a 30 minute Pilates DVD while the kids were napping.  

...and with all that (which isn't a lot), I'm exhausted.  It's 6:15 and I'm ready for bed, but the kids are still awake, and will be for a while longer.  

I'm not sure why I picked today to start.  We have a wedding this weekend, and one next weekend, and will be out of town for the entire weekend for both.  But I guess I'll just have to make sure I don't over due it!  With vacations I gained back "all" of the weight I lost and then some.  I think the 'and then some' was water weight though because I lost it in 2 days of being home.  We had a great vacation though!  We flew in Buffalo, NY went to Niagara Falls, then Sleepy Hollow, a stop at West Point, a few days in New York (and all the touristy stuff), down to D.C., over to Virginia Beach, down to the outer banks of North Caroline (which I don't really recommend), then back to Virginia Beach for a day trip (we really didn't like the outer banks), then off to Raleigh to fly back home!  It was an awesome 9 days!  When we got home Kyle went back to work for 2 days, then we headed up north to Camp du Nord in Ely, MN with my family for a week.  It was so much fun!  I love it up there!  Elliot had a great time this year and was obsessed with going in the water and hiking!  This was the first year that my family wasn't involved in Burn Camp and it was great to actually be able to enjoy camp together.  Normally my parents have a ton of responsibilities and we have a lot of things to go to, but this year there was nothing that we had to do.  And it was GREAT!  It finally felt like a real vacation!

We've been back home now for about a week and a half.  I was worried that after three weeks from home the kids were going to take a while to get back on schedule, but they were no problem at all!  Thankfully!  Of course it's been extremely warm lately so we haven't done much outside, but we have been utilizing our screened in porch quite a bit!  That's one room in the house that I have grown to love!  We have someone coming out to give us an estimate for a fence on Tuesday.  Hopefully they'll be able to put it up quickly because then Elliot can play outside and I won't have to worry about leaving Caroline to (potentially) have to chase Elliot down the street (as he heads to the park)!

Well, I guess that's all for now, I'm really going to try to keep updated more often, especially with how the weight loss stuff is going.  I find that I'm much more accountable when I write about it!

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Shake It Out

It's been quite a while, and I feel like I have a lot to write, yet nothing to write.  

I had a summer class for three weeks starting May 29th.  I like the three week classes because they're really quick, but the last time I took one I only had one child to deal with.  I was beyond exhausted for the three weeks.  It didn't help that the first weekend was June Dairy Days.  I get almost no sleep that weekend.  I stay up until 3 or 4 in the morning, and while my friends are sleeping off the previous night, I have two children who are ready for action.  Thankfully my parents help out a lot with them, but I don't want to seem like we're taking advantage (even though we are) and I get up and at least feed Caroline.  I never got my sleep caught up and finally on the last day of class (Friday June 15th) I crashed and had a major migraine.  Thankfully Kyle was able to stay home so I could sleep the whole day.  I ended up with an A in the class, so that makes me feel like the work was worth it.  

June 16th (the day after my bed confining migraine) I did the 6k (3.7 miles) Glo Race in Chicago.  It starts at 9:15pm and everyone wears glow-in-the-dark attire and there's black lights and strobe lights as you run along the shore and through the park.  The last time I ran before this race was April 22.  And by running I mean a run-walk combo.  In my head I was remembering the first 5k I did after Elliot was born, but forgot to remember that I was about 20 lbs lighter and had actually trained for a month before the race.  Add into that a day spent walking around the city in 90+ degree weather and no water.  I was very dehydrated.  I chugged a ton of water before the race and had just started to not feel like I was going to throw up/pass out when we left for the race.  I went to the race with two friends and one friend of a friend.  My friends are in shape, and run semi-regularly.  The friend of a friend has been turning into a competitive runner, and she was off and away about 3 seconds into the race.  My friends, being nice, stayed at the slow pace with me.  We had decided that this was more of a shuffle than a race, so I didn't feel terrible about slowing them down.  Let me add that it was still 80+ degrees at this point, and humid.

Then came the water station.  In my head a water station should be about 1/2 way through a race, I was mistaken.  The water station came about 1/3 of the way through the race.  I shouldn't have stopped, but I was so thirsty, and thought I was half way through.  The stopping killed my momentum, and when we turned the corner we were running into the wind.  At about 1.5-1.75 miles I was done.  My body was on fire - heat wise, not pain wise.  My legs actually felt fine.  I felt like my face was burning.  I told my friends to just keep running, because I knew that they wanted to run, but they said the race was more for fun and we were all going to finish together.  I was happy to know that I have friends who were willing to stick with my out of shape butt, but at the same time I felt terrible about myself.  I was so out of shape that I was holding them back.  Embarrassed easily sums up how I felt for the rest of the race.  It started raining but not enough to cool me down.  

When we got done (time of 55:15) we had no idea where the water was.  All we could find was the sponsored tents which were handing out 5 hour energy and some protein drink that smelled like a multi vitamin and had the consistency of yogurt - YUCK.  Finally we found water, granola bars, and cookies.  Not what I want to eat after I run.  Sweets sounded terrible.  We sat for a while listening to the DJ, then the rain picked up and the lighting was coming, so we all got kicked out of the park.  We were debating taking a cab or just getting on the L.  We ended up choosing the L because there wasn't a cab in sight - I was fine with that because then I could spend more time in the rain.  After 2 miles of walking in the race and walking farther to the L in the rain, I still felt overheated and dehydrated.  I was pretty positive that if I opened my mouth I would throw up and/or pass out.  My silence helped me think back to the last time I felt this terrible.  I've been running in heat before and never had so many issues.  I was dehydrated, but to feel this terrible?  Then I remembered.  I'm back on medication that can cause nausea, loss of coordination, blurred vision, and a whole other mess of things, and dehydration ends up being way worse than "normal" dehydration*.

When we got to our stop the rain was pouring - this made me happy.  Even through our 6 block trek home, with rain soaking our clothes, I still didn't cool down.  We walked in the door and I went straight into the shower and turned it on cold.  I sat in there for 15-20 minutes before the water started to feel cold.  I started crying and I'm not sure why.  I think a big part of it was that I felt so terrible.  I hate feeling sick, and Kyle (or my mom) were hours away.  Another reason, was my bruised ego.  I was finally facing what I already knew: I am in terrible shape.  I already knew it, and knew I felt terrible about myself, but this was the first time other people had seen it first hand.  In my head I created a scenario that my friends were talking to the other girl, making excuses for me, 'well, she just had a baby,' 'well, she said she wasn't feeling good before.'  I don't know if/think this actually happened, but I couldn't help myself from imagining the worse.  I was confronting the realization that someone, who I didn't know, was now able to judge me for being overweight.  My friends have always known me, and are going to love me no matter what, but this girl (who seemed very nice, and I don't think was actually judging) now had ammunition to judge me and proof of my failure.  And so I continued to cry.  I felt fine sitting down but every time I stood I thought I would pass out.  I quickly got dressed then laid down and started sipping water and ate some left over pizza to get something in my stomach.  

I texted Kyle that the run was "the most terrible idea ever" and fell asleep trying not to start crying again.  The next morning I woke up, packed, and headed home.  It was Father's Day so I wanted to get there early, but I also felt like I couldn't face my friends.  I was too ashamed and it created this awkwardness in me.  

The last few nights I've had a dream that I have something growing over my eyes and my vision is blurred and I have to go to the doctor to get these drops and the doctor uses a big Q tip to clean my eyes (like Woody in Toy Story 2), swiping over each one twice.  When the layers of whatever it is come off, there's a little bit of diluted blood that also gets wiped up.  One of the friends from this weekend is sitting in the room with me.  I finally googled dream interpretation since I've had the dream twice now.  Here's the link and the bottom of the page is all about eye stuff.  I think it's right, and I think it all has to do with me loosing weight, but not actually doing it, and feelingl so terrible about myself.  I think this friend is also there because she's been a part of every terrible (and happy) time in my life.  Also, I was at her place when I really realized how shitty I feel, so there's probably that connection as well.  Once during my freshman year of college (aka the "downward spiral") I was drunk and called her and cried and told her how unhappy I was with everything I was doing and who I was.  She talked to me for a long time, then told me to call her back tomorrow when I was sober and we'd talk some more.  I never called.  Again, embarrassment.  We've never talked about it, but I still remember it (well, the event not all the details) and know I can always count on her if I need her, and she's not going to judge me.  And I know she knows the same goes for her if she ever needs me.       

*I always said if I needed to go back on medication, I would.  Being home with two kids has been trying for me.  I asked my doctor (family practice, so he doesn't really know a ton about mental health - not his fault) if I could get an anti-anxiety medication, or something that I could take as needed, but with my body reacting badly to medications I've been on in the past (read as: causing manic episodes), he felt more comfortable putting me back on the last bi-polar medication that worked.  I'm supposed to go see a psychiatrist so we can make sure that I'm taking the right/best medication for how I'm feeling, but it was already hard enough for me to find someone to watch the kids for the first appointment, yet alone trying to do it again... so I'll just stick with this stuff, even though it's not what I was looking for...

So, yeah, I guess I did have something to write about...  even after all of this realization, I still haven't worked out this week.  Taking the kids outside in the heat (specifically Caroline, she's still so little), isn't a good time, and when they're napping I've been so tired that I nap too.  When they go to bed at night, I make dinner, watch a little TV, then go to bed.  I'm too exhausted to work out.  I'm too exhausted to even shower some days.  If Kyle's not home, what's the point?  No one's going to see me anyway.  And I think that's the problem.  I'm comfortable(ish) with the way I look when I'm around people who love me, but as soon as I'm in public, I feel terrible.  I also think that the people who know me, know that even though I'm a pretty strong person, when it comes to hearing criticism (even if it's constructive) about my weight, I can easily crumble.  It's the one area in my life which I know I'm failing in.  I hate failing.   

I want to end this with some positive, "Okay, now I'm going to get in shape and change my life!" type message, but it just seems so fake.  I think the best I can do right now is say that I'm not going to eat anything fried or order take out when Kyle's not home.  We have a vacation coming up in a week and I don't want to make some crazy goal and completely ruin it because we're enjoying our time together.  The whole point of vacations (for us) is to try amazing food!  So, nothing fried, and no take out during the week.  That much I think I can do.  

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

No! Not Yeti's!

Political Ad of the Day:  Vote Arthur Kohl-Riggs  -- I'm not going to actually vote for him, and am not endorsing him, but I love this Ad.  I was watching Comedy Central when I first saw it, and honestly thought it was a joke.  The Dos Equis "most interesting man in the world" commercials are some of my favorite, and good for him for making his own version.

It's been 2 weeks since I last wrote anything and even longer since I wrote about weight issues.  I have missed the pass two weigh-in's and honestly had just forgotten about them.  My days all kind of blend together and Elliot got sick, and I've been sick, and next thing I know, two weeks have gone by.  

I've been exhausted constantly.  Kyle travels every week and about every 7-10 days for 3-4 days Caroline will get up in the middle of the night to eat.  This cuts down even more on my sleep.  Because I'm so tired I find myself mindlessly eating and snacking just for energy to stay awake.  Sometimes it's healthy like strawberries, sometimes it's semi-healthy like chips and homemade salsa or cheese and crackers, and sometimes it's leftover Pizza Hut that I ordered the night before because I was too tired to make dinner for myself.  And that includes being too tired to throw a Lean Cuisine in the microwave.  Unfortunately, no matter how tired I am, I can't seem to fall asleep before 10.  I think I'm just so excited to finally have some time alone that I can't fall asleep.

I know I should try to nap when the kids nap, but lately that's only been a 45 minute overlap when they're both sleeping.  That gives me enough time to eat lunch, go to the bathroom, and then I get to pick shower or nap.  If I pick nap I end up not being able to fall asleep right away, and when I do fall asleep I'm awaken minutes later by Caroline.  If I pick shower, I may still be tired, but at least I'm clean.

Working out has been completely thrown to the wayside.  We were going to move the treadmill inside this weekend, but didn't want to do it in the rain on Saturday and forgot on Sunday.  It's probably for the best right now since we're having Elliot's birthday party this weekend!  

I want to be super mom and make all of the food and the cake for the party, and somehow do it with both kids, and have everything decorated and ready by Saturday at 1:00.  Thankfully, I'm blessed with a wonderful husband who knows how to manage my overachieving into realistic goals and he said I could make either the cake or the food.  I chose to make the cake (and at this moment still have no idea what I'm going to make), and we were going to order pizza from Famous Yeti's, which as I think I've explained before, is the best pizza ever.  This is where the problem comes in.  In the wee morning hours of Monday there was a fire at Stoughton Spirits.  This is where we buy wine, so I was interested in the article and kept looking for updates.  In the afternoon I read this report, paying close attention to line 4 which states: "The fire also damaged a pizza parlor."  If this was a movie, this would be the part where I quickly sit up straight, my eyes wide with realization that the pizza parlor next to Stoughton Spirits is ... pause for dramatic effect ... Famous Yeti's!  NOOOOO!!!!

So when (if) they open today I have to give them a call and see if they will be open Saturday... and of course upon further inspection of their website I realized that they don't open until 3 on Saturday... so I may also have to ask if they would even be able to make pizzas to be ready by 1.  Among other things on my to-do list is to find another place to get food from or order a cake from...  and still buy decorations... and gifts...

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

I bet you think this blog is about you.

I couldn't tell you the last time I de-friended someone that I actually know on facebook.  I've tried "cleaning house" on my friends list to delete people that I have absolutely no clue who they are, but I typically get through the first page then I'm bored and just hope that they someday do the same thing and they can delete me.  

I am a facebook over-share-er.  I know this, and really I don't care.  If someone doesn't like it, they can de-friend me or remove me from their news feed if they still want to creep on my page.  Whatever, I'm not updating my status for them anyway.  I update my status for family and friends.  I share when I'm going to spend the day cleaning up Elliot's puke because I want those who care about me to know that I'm going to have a long day and I may not answer their phone calls/texts right away.  I also know that many of them will understand what I'm going through, or at least empathize and say a little prayer to help me through my day  

Today a girl that I have known for at least 10 years posted a status that read something along the lines of, "When I get out of bed I'm de-friending people who only talk about their kids on facebook..."  I put it in quotes just so it's easy to understand who said what, but I am strongly paraphrasing here.  This girl has also posted many times that she doesn't want children.  I totally support her in that decision.  If you don't want kids, don't have them.  Just because you get married doesn't mean that you should have children.  I actually congratulated her on being able to admit this and defended her decision to other people that I know who though she was being rude and dramatic.  Every other week or so she'll post some anti-child, "I thank God I don't have kids" rant, and whatever, that's her choice.  She'll post pictures of women postpartum that have stretch marks (women who took the pictures because they are proud of their stretch marks and what they mean, and want to be encouraging to other women) and talk about how disgusting they are and how she's glad she'll never look like that.  Again, whatever, she can say what she wants, and yeah, stretch marks are disgusting.  Would I trade my children for smooth skin?  Absolutely not.

Like most of her anti-kids rants, she got a few likes, some supportive comments, and lots of comments from people pissed about what she said.  Or in her words "easily offended."  She then ended the comments saying that she was only talking about 2 or so people who post 30 pictures a day of their kids and always talk about them pooping or puking.  At this point I realized (especially given that her morning status was about 30 minutes after I posted mine about Elliot being sick) that she is probably talking about me.  Okay, Kyle travels 4-5 days of the week, and all of our family and friends live at least 2.5 hours away (with the exception of about 10 people).  I post a ton of pictures so they can all see our kids, and I share everything about my day because 1) If they call, they already know what's going on, and 2) I'm a stay at home mom, and my kids are my job.  The most exciting part of my day is when Elliot says a new word or Caroline giggles.  As of an hour ago we were still facebook friends, and I'm assuming that she was out of bed by then, so maybe she wasn't talking about me after all.

Then I realized it didn't matter if she was talking about me or not.  I don't want to see her status updates (whether they are meant to be negative, or "just her opinion") or comments anymore.  It's not worth it.  We're not even friends.  At best we may be acquaintances.  And really, it's probably better for us both that we're no longer facebook friends because I'm going to keep posting about my kids, and she's going to keep posting how she is annoyed by it.  I'll call this a win-win-win situation. 

....and yes, the song reference could go for either her or me... which makes it a double awesome choice as the 'song of the day' :)

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Fun Weekend

Song of the day:  Taylor Swift ft. The Civil Wars - Safe & Sound

Friday I did a 60 minute pilates video that I had.  This one is much better than the new one I bought.  When Kyle got home we ordered chinese.  Bad idea.  I ate way too much.  My plan was to save some for lunch on Saturday, but it was just so good!  I had Kung Po chicken, so the vegetables and chicken are actually healthy, and the sauce isn't heavy so that's good... but the pint of rice probably wasn't a good idea.  

Saturday I went on another 5 mile run.  This time I ran more and walked less and was able to shave 6 minutes off my time!  My first mile was done at an 11 minute pace!  Not the best I've ever ran, but it's definitely getting better - and there's even a hill in my first mile :)  My parents came down for the afternoon so they could watch the kids and we could get some more work done without Elliot's "help."  We had Subway for lunch, and went with 6" subs instead of foot longs.  We got a ton of work done - and hopefully will be able to finish unpacking today.  For dinner we order Pizza from Famous Yeti's Pizza.  It's easily the best pizza I've every had.  So amazing!  I didn't track my calories for the day though, but I don't think I was out of control like I was Friday.

This morning started off with a healthy breakfast of whole wheat toast, blue cheese (from Laughing Cow), spinach, over easy egg, topped with sweat peppers and tomato, a side of bacon, and coffee.  This is what I had yesterday morning as well, and is pretty close to what I have every morning, but is so so good!  Kyle commented on how my presentation of the food had gotten better from yesterday's first try, so I thought a picture was due. 

Today we're returning some stuff to Target and Home Depot, taking some stuff to Goodwill, and doing some shopping.  I would also like to go tanning today, and grocery shopping for the week is also on the "to-do" list.  I'm hoping to be able to get in another run today, but I may miss my workout today :/  Hopefully not... I'm just glad that I moved my weigh-in day from Monday to Thursday!

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Week 1 Weigh In

Song of the Day:  Wiz Khalifa - When I'm Gone

Starting Weight: 230.4
Week 1: 224.2

Total: 6.2 lbs

Woo-Hoo!!  I have to say that I am surprised!  I thought I would only lose maybe .5 lbs between Monday and today.  If you haven't noticed I am also tracking my weight loss on the right hand side of the screen.  I know it's not good to lose almost 3 lbs in 4 days, but I really think that my Monday weigh-in was thrown off by a little dehydration.  So yay!  I'm excited and more motivated to eat healthy and get my workout in today!

Last night Kyle and I had spaghetti.  Normally I would load up my plate with tons of noodles, pour enough sauce to drown them, and add about 4 slices of garlic bread - to start.  See, I LOVE garlic bread.  I buy a loaf of french bread, slice it, butter both sides, and put garlic powder and garlic salt on the up side, then brown in the oven for 10-15 minutes.  AMAZING.  And absolutely terrible for you.  Well, not absolutely terrible, but the terrible part is that Kyle and I will eat the whole loaf.  That meal probably packs enough calories for at least 2 days.  So, partially to help my self-control, and partially me not thinking about picking up bread at the grocery store, we skipped the garlic bread.  I had 1 cup of noodles and 1/2 cup of sauce... afterwards I realized that a serving of cooked noodles is actually 1.5 cups, but I was actually full.  I even had enough calories to have a glass of red wine with dinner :)  Not too bad for being on a "diet."

Elliot is now able to open the fridge.  The handle of the fridge at our apartment was too high for him to reach and have leverage to open the door.  The fridge in the house has a handle that stretches the length of the door.  Thankfully he goes for really healthy stuff - and there's not really anything unhealthy in our fridge, just stuff he should eat, like jalapenos.  This morning Kyle was finishing getting ready and I was brushing my teeth, Elliot was sick of waiting for us, and headed down the stairs.  He was downstairs maybe a minute before us and when we got there he had the strawberries out and was eating them (including the green part -ewwww).  Now that he can open the fridge he wants to pick out his own food.  Hello independence!  Yesterday for lunch he wanted string cheese and apple slices.  This morning for breakfast it's strawberries, cold penne noodles, and half a bagel.  Whatever I guess.  As long as he's eating, and it's healthy choices, I'm okay with it.     

I can hear Caroline's heavy deep sleep breathing on the baby monitor and it's making me so sleepy... time for coffee!!

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

I'm just resting my eyes...

Song of the Day: Justin Bieber - Boyfriend

After yesterdays fiasco I didn't work out.  Really, it had nothing to do with being locked in the basement, but I'm going to use it as an excuse anyway.  Honestly, I'm just exhausted.  By the time Elliot goes down for a nap I have an hour or so to eat lunch, work out, and shower before Caroline is up.  I didn't feel like doing any of those things... except eat lunch.  That means I haven't worked out since last Thursday... yikes.  So yeah, I worked out today.  I did a cardio dance 35 minute DVD.  I then attempted a pilates DVD.  Turns out I have zero ab muscles and the instructor was terrible, and calling her an instructor is a term used loosely.  So after about 12 minutes I just turned it off.  I'm hoping to go for a run tonight when Kyle gets home, but that will depend on the weather and how I'm feeling.

Lately I've been exhausted and the lack of sleep has been catching up with me.  Last night I fell asleep on the couch around 8ish.  I was trying to motivate myself to work out before Kyle got home, and fell asleep in the process.  I woke up at 8:30 because Kyle was calling to say he was on his way home.  After we hung up, I fell back to sleep and may have woken up a little when Kyle came in, but the next thing I remember is it's 11:30 and he's telling me to come up to bed.  Then out of nowhere it's 6:00am and Elliot is jumping on me and hitting my head.  Awesome.  I think I really need to get more sleep, but I don't want to go to bed earlier, especially if Kyle is home.  We only have so much time together so going to bed early just seems lame.  Even if he's not home, after the kids go to bed is my only time that I get to myself, and I rather spend it watching reruns of The Big Bang Theory or The Office while surfing Facebook and Twitter instead of sleeping.  Yes, my priorities are probably a little off... 

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

trapped in the basement

Song of the Day: R. Kelly - Trapped In The Closet Chapter 1 - feel free to waste your day watching all 500 (exaggeration) chapters...

Our dining room table and chairs was scheduled for sometime between 9:30 and 11:30.  Thankfully they showed up at 9:30....

...our basement door has a real lock on it.  Like, you need a key to get upstairs if it's locked.  Well I took clothes down to the laundry, walked back up and realized that I was locked in the basement.  Quick mental assessment of the children, Elliot is watching Veggie Tales and Caroline is in the pack 'n play fed and changed.  Okay, check for my phone.  Not in my pocket, it's on the couch.  Crap.  Look through the few tools that are down there to see if I can pick the lock with anything... see, I watch a lot of cop shows and stuff like White Collar that have me convinced that I can break into/out of anything... of course, there's nothing except a few crowbars.  I check out all the windows, one looks promising without the promise of lots of spider webs.  Thankfully we also have ladders in the basement.  As I'm looking out the front window I see the Slumberland furniture truck.  Yay!!  Then it drives away.  No!!  I'm hoping that they just looked at the front door to see the note that says to to the back door, and are now driving around the block.  I go up the stairs to the basement doorway and look out the door that leads outside - that does not open.  (and yes, I did try to call Elliot to open the basement door, with no luck).

The truck pulls up and the guys get out and I start knocking on the door.  The guy looks at me hesitantly then walks over.  I explain that I'm locked in the basement and ask him to go see if the back door is unlocked.  I was hoping that I left it unlocked when I took the trash out this morning - apparently I didn't.  So I head to the window at the front of the house and the furniture guys head there too.  I unlock the inside window, they unlock the outside window and I pry it open with the crow bar and use the ladder to help crawl out.  Yay! I'm out of the basement!!  But I'm still locked out of the house.  

I know that the dinning room windows don't have screens and that one comes open without the crank... but they're all locked so that doesn't help.  We tried getting Elliot's attention and then told him to go open the door.  He laughed and smiled and waved at us waving at him... thanks for the help kid!  There's a window that goes from our 3 season porch to the play room... one of the only windows with a fully intact screen... which is now a casualty of war.  I tried to pop the screen out, but it didn't work, so I punctured it with the crowbar and ripped it out.  I was then able to push up the inner window and climb inside.  Thankfully I had not locked that window!

Then they loaded in our new table and chairs.  It all took about 30 minutes, and the moving guys  complimented me on how well I was handling the whole situation... I think I have all the cop shows I watch to thank for showing that staying cool under pressure is much more productive.

And good news is that the kids had no idea :)  ...and now to finish the laundry... step 1: unlock basement door.

Monday, April 16, 2012

monday monday

Song of the Day:  Carly Rae Jepsen - Call Me Maybe

If you're looking for a Monday weigh in, you'll find it, but not regularly.  This morning I weighed in at 227.0 lbs.  Down 3.4 lbs from last week!  I decided that I'm going to do my official weigh in on Thursdays.  This weekend I wouldn't say that I fell off the wagon, but I definitely was holding on for my life to keep from falling off.  

The problem with the weekends isn't really eating, it's working out.  I only see Kyle on the weekends due to his work travel schedule, and I don't want to spend those few hours that we do actually get together as a family, or without the kids, working out.  Now, I know the option of working out as a family is there.  If it was nice we could have gone for a walk, or to the park, but it rained all weekend, so that wasn't an option.  Instead we stayed inside all weekend, continuing to unpack.  You'd think we'd be done by now... I also forget to drink as much water as I normally do during the week, and this morning I can feel the water retention in my hands.  So, I'm sharing my weight today, but it won't be official until Thursday.  But I'm really excited to see the weight starting to go!

Our dinning room table and chairs get delivered tomorrow morning!  I can't wait!  I'm so sick of eating on the couch, and allowing Elliot to eat in the living room!  We got a couch cover because the fabric was looking so gross.  Elliot has stained it with juice, jelly, fruit, and just overall drool.  I've tried cleaning it, and some of the stains come up, but not enough.  We're still trying to decide what new furniture we want, and what will fit in the room (which is kind of hard to do since we still have some boxes in there), so we haven't ordered anything yet, but when we do - all leather.  

I have 6 week postpartum doctor appointment this afternoon (a week late), and I'm hoping to get my workout in before then.  I am all dressed in workout clothes, but Elliot turns off my tape every time I start it, even though the TV is otherwise off.  Apparently he doesn't want me to work out, lol.  So, I'm just hanging out in my workout clothes.  I'm looking forward to the day where it doesn't look ironic that I'm wearing yoga pants...

Friday, April 13, 2012

5 miles... sure, why not?

I love this song.  It's on the Disney advertisement before the Cars 2 movie.  It just makes me feel good and smile :)

Yesterday I didn't get around to doing the 30 Day Shred.  Caroline was having an "I want Mommy all day" day, which is perfectly fine with me (except when I really have to pee...).  So when Kyle got home at 7:40 I gave him a kiss and was out the door for a run.  I ran/walked 5 miles in 70 minutes, a 14 min/mile average.  Not bad for my first time out.  My first mile was about 12 min/mile, and they got longer and longer as I started walking more and running less.  Why start with 5 miles you may ask?  Well one of my goals is to walk/run 5 miles a week, and it's supposed to rain for the next 4 days and I don't want to not reach my goal on the first week.  I'm actually feeling pretty good today.  Just a little sore in my right hip, but I think after moving around for awhile that will go away.

The diet part of losing weight really hasn't been hard this time around.  It's just tedious to weigh everything and really make food, and that hasn't really even been that tedious or time consuming.  I actually find myself needing to eat a snack after dinner to make sure I get enough calories for the day.  Last night my choice was 1/2 cup of in the shell pistachios.  I like when they're in the shell because then you have to work for them, and they take longer to eat, so you don't eat as many (in theory).  I measured out 1/2 cup so I wasn't going to eat more anyway.  What I hate about pistachios in the shell is the possibility of biting a piece of missed shell.  This happened to me last night.  A tiny piece of the shell stuck and it felt like I had just bitten a rock.  Thankfully I didn't chip a tooth or anything, but ugh, pain.  

Since Kyle's home tonight my plan (again) is to make salmon.  This time I actually got it out of the freezer, so the chances are greater that I'll make it tonight, lol.  Maybe we'll even get out the grill!

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Day 4

Song of the Day: Phantom Planet - California

Thanks to Facebook's timeline I looked at some super old (like 7 years ago) pictures of myself.  At that time I thought I was so fat and wanted to lose weight.  Now I'd give my left hand to look like that again!  Someday.  My song of the day is a nod back to 2003/2004 and those pictures.

I didn't get around to making salmon for dinner, but I actually came in under the low end of my calorie range.  I got done eating dinner and was so tired that I didn't even want the snack (of even potentially candy) that I could have.  I was sleeping by 9:00 and it felt great!  Caroline slept through the night, so I'm glad she's back on schedule.  Elliot was up at 6:00 and Caroline at 6:30.  Everyone is back on track!  Kyle gets home tonight and I can't wait!  Even though he's gone for 90% of the kid's day, it's just nice to know that he's there at the end of the day.  

I finished day 3 of JM 30 Day Shred.  There's parts of the level 1 routine that are becoming easy, but there's other parts that are tough for me to finish.  I don't think I'm ready for level 2, but I do feel like I want to do more cardio.  What's nice about the dvd is that it's only 27 minutes long, and sometimes that's all the time I'm guaranteed.  Most of our other dvd's are an hour long, so I might have to look for another 30 minute cardio dvd to add to the 30 Day Shred if time allows. 

Both kids are now on antibiotics and Elliot started coughing when he got up from his nap yesterday.  I called the doctor again and asked if they wanted to test him to confirm the case, but since we were made aware of it so quickly, and he already started medication, there's a good chance the test would produce a false negative.  Which means he may or may not have it, but he's getting treated anyway, and we are quarantined for the next five days.  Now, if the five days start from the first time he took medicine that means until 4:00 on Monday.  If it means that Wednesday (when he started meds) counts as Day 1, that means through Sunday he can't go anywhere.  With the first option Kyle now has to take part of Monday off because I have a doctor appointment, thankfully he's not out of town.  But either way, we're missing Veggie Tales Live on Sunday.  We bought tickets for Elliot's birthday (coming up in May).  Thankfully he's too young to know that he was going, or now that he's missing it, but I'm still angry.  I was pissed about this whole thing, and now I'm angry.  And even though it's the last day of quarantine, I'm not going to do what the Typhoid Mary family did and infect hundreds of people by being negligent about how my child's health affects other people. 

Okay, I promise that I'm done with my angry rant about the kids being sick.  What's done is done, and now, I just have to let it go.