Day 257 - emotional day

Song of the day:  Foster The People - Pumped Up Kicks


I probably should have started the last entry describing how terrible the first day of daycare went.  It was so hard.  Elliot started crying as soon as we walked in the door, he cried harder when we walked into his room, he cried harder when I put him down, and he cried even harder when I left.  I cried, and then bawled through the whole thing too!  Thankfully the teachers were really great and let me know that this is really common on the first day.  But as soon as I got in my car I sat in the parking lot for about 3 minutes bawling, then cried the entire way to school, then for about another 3 minutes in the parking lot at school.  So the fact that by day 2 he was already loving it there was awesome :)  He still is loving it there.  He whines a little bit when I leave in the morning, but could care less when I get there at night.  Unfortunately he's already gotten sick.  There's been a few kids in the center, some of them from his room, that have been sent home sick :(  He has a runny nose and a cough still but hopefully he'll get better this weekend.


School has been going really well.  I think it's because I'm older and have had more experience with responsibility, time management, and organization, but when I hear others complaining about the work load or "how hard" something is going to be, I just don't get it.  I don't think any of my classes are overly hard, or have a tough amount of work.  Of course, I also don't spend the entire class texting, so that may help with my knowledge retention.  I also don't find myself losing focus during the class period.  Maybe it's because I want to be there now, whereas I was there because I thought I was supposed to be back in the day.  Also, when I first did school I got C's and was stoned 90% of the time, so imagine how well I can do sober :)  That probably explains some of my focus issues back then...  


Today I had a ton of stuff I had a ton of stuff to do.  First I went to the chiropractor, then got the oil changed in my car, got my ring cleaned, then headed to my baby doctor appointment.  The nurse took my vitals and then started to use the hand doppler to check the babies heart rate.  The nurse couldn't find the heart beat and started asking me if I had been feeling the baby move.  I have felt the baby move, but it's not constant and it's more of a pressure than the butterflies that come in a few weeks.  She said she was going to see if they wanted to do a bed side ultra sound.  As this point I'm starting to freak out a little.  I had just told Kyle the night before that I was worried about the baby because I always get that way before an appointment because it's been a month since I last heard/saw the baby.  My doctor's regular nurse came in and she started using the hand doppler to see if she could find the heart beat while they were getting the bed side ultrasound machine ready.  I've met his nurse before and I am very confident in her skills, so I was sure that she was going to find it.  About 30-60 seconds later (but what felt like 10 minutes) she still hadn't found the heart beat and when to get the machine.  The doctor came in with the machine and by this point I'm full out crying.  [Let me just mention here that Kyle wasn't with me.  So I'm thinking that I had a miscarriage and my husband isn't even here to help me through it.  I also started worrying that I wouldn't be able to get a hold of him and I wanted him to come home right away.]  He and the nurse did a really good job of calming me down, and of course to make it a little worse Elliot see's me crying and starts crying too (which in a way made me feel better that he didn't like to see me cry).  At first the baby just looked like a lump and then it started to move.  There was only about 4 seconds between spotting the baby and seeing it move but it felt like 4 minutes.  The doctor found the heart beat and it was going strong at 151 bmp.  So, long story short, the baby and I are doing just fine :)  It was extremely emotional, but I'm glad I got to see the baby and that the baby is okay. 


After my appointment I had to get blood work done and since I was already at the clinic I decided to get my flu shot as well.  We finally got home at 1:00, which meant we were out for 4 hours, and Elliot did a really good job considering he had to spend most of the time in a stroller or the car.  When we got back we had lunch then he went down for a nap and I lounged around in bed but never actually fell asleep.  Either way, with the emotional rollercoster of the morning it felt nice just to relax.  


Good news is that we just got a loan for a new car and might go shopping this weekend, but most likely will be going next Saturday.  We are having lunch with one of Kyle's friends from work and his family tomorrow!  They have three boys so Elliot will have a lot of fun :)  More fun is that next Friday we're going to the Brewer's game!  I also have two quizzes next week so I guess I'll finally find out if I really am retaining knowledge, or if I just think I am.  :)